Sunday, December 19, 2010

What's in a name?

I am for warning you guys that this is long and no pictures. This is not really like me but I just had to let it out. I feel like I've been holding it in too long.

Have you ever thought about that? What your name really means to you? To me it was just what people called me to get my attention. For the last 6 years I feel like I have become lost without my name. For anyone who has known me longer than 6 years, you probably know me as Katy. But once I met Weston I didn't want to confuse people since there was already a Katie in the family so I went by my real name Katrina. This past week I have run into some people from the past that called me Katy and it brought back so many happy memories and made me feel happy. I miss that. I want it back.

In the past month I have come to realize that my name, Katy, has much more meaning to me then I thought. It is who I am, my reputation, my identity, and my life. Unfortunately now I feel like that has been taken from me. My name has been dragged through the mud, ruined my credit and my reputation. It is just not fair. I have worked my whole life to be a good and responsible person but now that has all been taken from me by someone who does not have the same values, responsibility or work ethic.

So in an attempt to find myself, I would love to have my name Katy back but that is not possible. While speaking with the credit people trying to fix my credit they deleted the name Katy off my file and told me never to use it again in hopes that I won't get any future bad marks on my credit report. I know I have recently been going by my full name Katrina, but I feel like it has a bad meaning sometimes when people associate it with the hurricane. Death and destruction. So I am thinking I need to go by something different. Weston thinks I'm crazy, but I feel like I need this. When I was a waitress, (I know what your all thinking. Me a waitress? And trust me, I wasn't any good,) they always had me as Kat on the rotation chart. But I don't think I like that. I'm not a cat and I don't meow. So I was thinking Kate. Does it fit me? Can I pull it off? I don't know, it might be too close to Katy too but I just can't think of anything else. So if anyone out there has any thoughts on this feel free to let me know. Thanks!

3 comments:

Holden and Audrey said...

I'm sorry you don't feel like you can go by Katy anymore since that's who you'll always be to me, but I think that Kate is a cute name. And if you decide that you want to go by Princess Consuela Banana-Hammock then that's what I'll call you! ;)

Heather said...

I feel like your name is such a part of your identity and I feel so bad that someone has kind of destroyed your identity. I definitely think you could go by Kate. You are so fun and sweet you could pull off any name.

Mike and Nic said...

I'm sorry someone 'crazy' has ruined your name for you!! I'm with Audrey though Katy is what you'll always be to me but if you want us to call you Princess Consuela Banana-Hammock I'm all for it. Or instead of Katy we could just call you by your first and middle name, Katrina Maxine. I know you never really liked Katrina Maxine but I think it fits you. Hahaha!